Romans 14:8 If we live, we live for the Lord, and if we die, we die for the Lord. So then, whether we live or die, we are the Lord’s.

Typically, American women dream of the day they are given away for marriage.  Oddly enough, I am not in that number of women.  In fact, I thought quite the contrary regarding the outcome of my life.  Obtaining a degree, landing a great career, and being an avid traveler was sufficient enough for me.  If I happened to get married between any of that was fine, but it was never a high demand on my list.  Even my former marketing teacher knew of my lack of concern for marriage and asked, “You don’t want a family one day, Marissa?”  My response, “ehhh” coupled with shrugged shoulders.  Why am I telling you this?  Well, a few years after that convo, I gave my life to Jesus and learned that with my new relationship came an entire new commitment which leads to the topic at hand. Divorce!

See my little blueprint of how I thought my life would look went straight out of the window.  I did not finish school, definitely not the international business woman I set out to be, and I am in a godly, healthy, and growing relationship that will actually lead to marriage.  Yeah, basically nothing I had on my list came to pass, haha!  But why?  Well, mostly because I chose my marriage to God over my marriage to self.  Oh and guess what?  This is a DAILY decision. Now school I do plan on finishing, and being an international businesswoman is not totally out of the ballpark, but it would be to spread His Word more than for my own personal agenda.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with traveling the world outside of spreading The Gospel.  Rissa loves a good flight now, honey.  I am just trying to illustrate how different my plans are from God.  I never dreamt of flying around the world to serve God or just serving Him period.  It was all about me, myself, and, I (hint: no need of my own family).   I never dreamt of dealing with a marriage and a divorce at the same time.  Marrying God and divorcing myself which means I have to now be open to what God wants for me and my life and to divorce every single thing that is contrary to that.  Say what now, Jesus?  You want ya girl to move to New York? What about Texas? Georgia? Louisiana? Still no? Okay, so here I am in New York living off of the provision of God, literally.  The job I currently hold which is in law, I have no background in and they hired and trained me anyway.  The relationship I am in now, although I prayed for it, I definitely did not see it coming as quickly as it did. You know, that’s the thing about God, He does not operate on our time.  His ways are far beyond our comprehension which is why faith is so vital.  Our faith in Him creates trust and that trust grows through various changes and trials in our life.  I am convinced that trials are not meant to harm or hurt us, but to deepen our relationship with Him.  What’s a marriage without obstacles to test it, right?  Marrying Christ just like marrying naturally is not going to be easy going and filled with lollipops.  There will be hardships, great days, and trying moments all to teach and develop us into mature Christians.  Speaking of which, the spiritually mature know that with this great marriage comes a great detachment, denial, yeah the big D – divorce!

Just as in the world, divorce is messy.  Think about committing yourself to someone for several years and then having to divorce that person, the very person you thought you loved the most.  That’s exactly how it feels to divorce yourself or in biblical terms, deny yourself and follow Christ.  Giving Jesus access as the Leader over our lives is, of course, the wise thing to do, but it is also a challenge.  Just as I previously stated, we have been living a certain way our entire lives and although it did not amount to much, it is familiar.  There is a development of comfort over time that has given us a false peace.  So, when Jesus presents His Peace to us we are reluctant to embrace it.  See, Jesus Peace may not necessarily rid us of our trials, but it strengthens us to persevere.  Whereas, in the world, we tried to rush our problems along only to be faced with more and be stricken with anxiety and despair.  Since we have adjusted ourselves to be okay with anxiety, it is now taxing to enter into this new way of living.  Oh, but it is so worth it, and freeing, and might I say exhilarating.  Oftentimes, I get a thrill of having Joy in the midst of a full-blown circus going on around me because it shows my environment does not dictate my internal, my spirit, or what I know to be true!  That truth that gives me confidence is in His Word and daily meditating and communing with God helps me to embrace His Ways more and more and makes the pain of divorce easier.  His Word shows me that my ways may seem right for a moment, but the outcome will always lead to a path of destruction(Prov. 14:12).  So I encourage you to deny yourself and to find your “why.”  If we don’t fully understand why we are doing this, success will not generate from it.  Find your why and deny!  #ISSADivorce

Check out the Answered Prayers/Testimonials tab, there will be a prayer that correlates with this post!  Don’t forget to check out Tag You’re It! for further edification on this topic.  Until next time, Rose Buddy Fam…PEACE!